What’s your full name?
Kelvin Steve
[‘Deolu: Seriously??? …The only people i know with these kinda names are Ermmm…i wouldnt wanna say it for the risk of sounding tribalistic….Fuck it! Am gonna say it, Calabar people 😛 ]
Your favorite Social Network and why?
Gotta be Twitter..basically, it emmm..the reasons are plenty abeg. Ranging from it being a platform to ‘speak’ my mind to being a hub for meeting people of like minds, passions and oh! Opposite sex 😀
[‘Deolu: Yall would be surprised at how many P’s this gentleman has set. Your secret is safe with me, Saka]
Hobbies/Interest
..a whole lot of stuff I won’t bother y’all with.
Tell us what you could do 24/7 365 days without getting tired of it (Ok, maybe 365 days is a bit over the edge)…
Live.
[‘Deolu: At-least that’s worst than dying, feel you on that one]
What exactly are you into?
Females. I don’t go into guys. Nah..strictly females…lol
[‘Deolu: Ermmm….i meant like a job but this answer is also good as well, definitely sets alot of things ‘straight’]
Your ideal partner_ (full description pls)?
Really can’t answer this cos errr, stuff changes.
[‘Deolu: You really cant catch a break, Can you? *sighs*]
What’s on your bucket list?
How many Nigerians really have bucket lists? We can form..abeg I ain’t got me no buckets or lists.
[‘Deolu: Nigerians do have bucketlists, mine includes skydiving, bungee jumping, shagging twin latino girls simulltaneously, been signed unto Mo’hits..oh wait, that dream is gone…. **getting angry** This is your last chance Saka, behave!]
What you would kill for to eat right this moment?
Its not that serious abeg. Neither am I that hungry. And how would killing someone/thing cos of food solve the hunger? Except of course I’m killing to eat..I’m rambling. My answer: nothing.
[‘Deolu: *cursing inaudibly around the studio*I meant that special meal thats been on your mind for a while]
Did you have anybody/people as role models (No parents pls :D)?
Did I or do I?
[‘Deolu: *storms into the studio manager’s office asking for permission to shoot Saka in the head, permission denied anyway*]
What was growing up like?
It felt like increasing in age and days daily. A mixture of the good, bad and the downright hilarious!
What’s your deepest fear?
Drowning…you said deepest right? Yeah.
[‘Deolu: At this rate, I might actually have to shoot myself in the head]
Any Superpowers?
I blow my own trumpet..
[‘Deolu: Publisher deleted my comment here, said it was over the top, which is way more than i can say for Saka’s responses]
Top 5 movies of all time?
I don’t have favorites, most times, its based on the ones I can recently remember..my fave noe though is “In Time” but I love movies with witty banter and retorts.
Top 5 music of all time?
The whole 8701 album by Usher.
[‘Deolu, that a huge fan uhn? Did you hear, Usher told people should stop buying Adele’s album so it doesnt break his Confession album record…Ok! I should shut up now *zips lips*]
5 people you would like to meet before you die?
Why? Someone planning a hit on me? I dunno jare..
[‘Deolu: Am definitely putting down payment on the hit now]
What would you say is the biggest risk you have ever taken?
Staying alive.
[‘Deolu : Considering how many people you’ve offended, its a surprise how you’re still alive]
What role has the Nigerian factor positively and negatively played in who you are today?
What is the Nigerian factor?
[‘Deolu: The Nigerian factor will be the fact that nothing ever works in this country, got it?]
What is your most memorable experience?
Can’t remember so I’m just gonna look ahead.
What experience would you rather delete from history if you could?
Michael Jackson’s death.
[‘Deolu: What? You’re sad you dint get a chance to be molested by Michael? ]
What would you say is your greatest fear?
You asked this earlier. Running outta questions are we?
[‘Deolu : Well, according to you, there is a difference between deepest and greatest, SO WILL YOU ANSWER THE GAWD DAMN QUESTIONS?]
If you are not into what you are doing now, what would you be doing?
Politics.
[‘Deolu: I certainly hope that this isnt 9ice inspired?]
Where do you see yourself in the next five years?
Leading in National Capacity.
[‘Deolu: I gotta give it to you, you got dreams bruv]
Name 3 people you met and completely changed your life positively?
Fela Durotoye, …
What’s the highest point of your life in recent time?
… I’m almost but not 6 feet.
[‘Deolu: *asks the people behind the camera* Can you see what I’ve been dealing with?]
Who are your partners in crime?
People will answer this?
[‘Deolu: Look around this site, Can you see the logo of the FBI, CIA, NSA, SSS, Boko Haram??, Am done with this guy…am out]
Ladies & gentlemen, I give you incredibly witty Sirkastiq
**Crowd stands up to applaud, people in the crowd jumping, screaming, flashing nipples, throwing flowers**
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